Superficially I am cool, too cool or rather casual for everyone but then it's just that I don't want to be serious. When you are serious, you should be serious for something that you desire, something to cherish, something meaningful, something worthwhile...
But then is there something that is so truly desirable? Are you noble enough to think yourself capable of making a difference... doing something worthwhile..something pure...Well you may be...And I really hope you should be... but I am not. I could have been but I am not...
It doesn't matter whether I could have been or I couldn't what matters is the truth. The present situation or reality or the fact whatever you may choose to call it. The statement is I am not.
"Choose" or choice is funny thing. Sometimes it is good to have it, but sometimes it is even better not to have it. Beacuse when you don't have a choice you have a strategy.
Let me explain, in a game of chess I have a choice of a number of move but my strategy is my decision of playing a particular move while saying no to the others. Whether the strategy is good or bad is different thing all together but then you do have a strategy. "Strategy" is nothing but saying no to all the options and going ahead with one.
However, life is not a chess. "Strategy" is just a tool to achieve your goal but what if your goal is itself not clear. Is it not better then, that you have no choice... then you atleast you know your goal. And you know what you have to do.. because it is the only thing that you can do!!!
I have said it before and I say it again, "Knowing a fact and accepting the fact are two different things!" While knowing a fact is relatively easy it's often much harder to accept the fact. And it is this difficulty in accepting the fact that makes life miserable.
"life is miserable!!!" compared to what?, you ask like a philosopher. "I don't know... I really don't know"...I am not a philosopher, had I even been one, do you think I would have figure it out?...May be life is miserable... compared to the life we expect ...compared to the life that could have been...the life that should have been, the way we expect it to be...the way they ought to be...the life we desire.
So may be life is miserable because of our desires... Now I am not going the Buddha way and claim that I have got enlightenment... the ultimate truth of the universe because surely I haven't!!! If I would have, I wouldn't have been blogging here, right! Would I? And certainly, I am not going to ask you to kill all your desires to be happy. For desires, are also the root cause of motivation... the reason why mankind is where it is now!!!
Remember, even Buddha desired everyone to be happy.(by killing all your desires) Lord Buddha chose an impossible goal... that everyone should be happy. Surely I think it is not possible, is it?
Buddha was a God,so perhaps he was able to find peace with himself but what about the lesser mortals like us?
Many times like Buddha we set impossible goals... or goals that are nearly impossible for us, primarily because we are unable to accept the facts... and there begins the end of our happiness...
Have I told you about my motivational theory? The Theory of Impossibility
See, when you choose to pursue an impossible goal or let's say a nearly impossible goal. You primarily, "know the fact" but "haven't accepted it yet!" An uncomfortable feeling caused by holding the two contradictory ideas simultaneously or Cognitive Dissonance in Psychological terms.
To reduce this uncomfortable feeling, one follows either of the two way:
- One may give up a goal soon enough. Thus ending the dissonance.
- One may believe that the goal is not unrealistic and he may achieve it with efforts and more skills and thus reducing the dissonance between the two ideas.
Now, if the person takes the second option, he or she will try double hard to get his goal. As he believes that the goal is realizable, typically that individual will believe he can control events that affect them or with HIGH INTERNAL Locus of control Now as long as his will to work to mold the events around him or self efficacy is able to hold the test of time he will be able to make rapid progress in all the areas in his life.
However, the real motivating factor of the impossible goal would always ask him to push a little harder.. a little bit more.
Such an individual would be high on confidence at least in public partially because of his recent social success due to his never ending quest for improvement,self-awareness and his willingness to adapt. However, this temporary measure will bring still more dissonance and frustration over his inability to achieve his aim.
If by chance, the individual achieves his target/goal it would bring immense satisfaction and high superiority complex in him for achieving his goal. Typically, these individuals when put in tough situations, would recall their struggle days. ( quite often portrayed in movies as supporting actors to the lead).
However, if the goal is genuinely impossible, the individuals may regret their decision and the time spent on the worthless chase, and may become increasingly irritable and short tempered over time.
Perhaps, it is for the same reason underdog stories are so popular because all they have to do is replace themselves with the lead character to satisfy their bruised ego.
Cartoons specially the action packed ones, display such emotions and trend in a dramatic fashion...