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Sunday, January 04, 2009

Then She smiled

"Monday was fine and I was on a high
Oh you thrilled me
I should be alright but Friday I died when you killed me
You're bringing me down to my knees,
Becoz I love You I love you so oh oh..."
-Roxette


There was a time when young maiden dreamt about those "knights in the shining armour". What made those maiden dream of them? Because they were not only brave but also chivalrous. As time changed, those knights became rare and people only talked about them. Slowly... and slowly they became extinct. And in these days of modern cars, they were reduced to a phrase used by hot gals.

Chivalry too, lost to the "cool dudes with attitudes" and in this world of modern times is a rare commodity. After all dry cleaning a coat is horribly expensive. Moreover in contrast to maidens with flowing gowns there is too little clothes on the hot babes to get dirty.

Our story begins in such modern times, where there are more hunks and no knights... where equality of sexes = going dutch. Where being open minded = using "fuck" as a conjunction. In the city of Pune - "the oxford of the east"....chivalry still a rare commodity.

And the last place to look for it was in him. Strangely enough he didn't belong to the "cool dude" category either. If you were to label him ... "born looser" would still be calling him euphemistically... with one exception, he had this devil may care attitude.

He would eat chocolate truffle with his mouth open in a coffee shop, using his hands and then lick his finger clean with a beautiful maiden beside him. Drink the water of a finger bowl only to get the pleasure of embarrassing his friends. He would readily ride pillion on a scooty with a gal dropping him home. Yawn with mouth as wide as a crocodile, eat "maggi noodles" cooked at home in a multiplex and even offer it to complete stranger in a middle of a movie to stop his staring look!!! Get bald and then would want opinion on his new hair-do. His long walks on date would translate to a walk of 5km at 3:00 pm. He would go to a girl with a bouquet and then ask her if it was fine to give it to his sister (Good Lord, it was his and not her sister)and not to mention the bouquet was made of wilting flowers. He would sit in a restaurant with the finest gentry on a chair turned around and then would proceed to make an ambigram of the gals name on tissue paper. He was the kind who could wear pink shirt on a date because his mother presented him so. But that was him a year ago... Had he changed??? He was in Pune after a gap of one year...

In an Autorickshaw near the university gate a cellphone beeped.

"Hello"

" I am leaving for home. You are two hour late!"

" I am sorry. You know it was rakhi yesterday... and my sister didn't allow me to leave till 11:00. Please wait I'll come!"

Somethings never change. Of all the days in a year he had picked the day after rakhi. What if she tied rakhi on his wrist!!! He hadn't even confessed his feelings for her! And to top it up he was going to see her after a year and was already two hours late.

" I am waiting since morning to meet you. I am going home."

" Please wait. I am on my way. "

" How much time will it take? "

" I am near the university gate and there is a traffic jam. I'll be there in an hour."

" An hour!!! It was a holiday in my college and I am here waiting for you. I am leaving."

"See, I know you waited so long and you can abuse me as much as you want but I can't talk to you right now. The traffic is too loud here. So it's better not to increase your mobile bill. you can scold me as much as you want once want once I reach there!!!"

Born loser - as ever. He takes things for granted. Man, didn't you hear she just said she'll be leaving.

"Alright! I am going to the library. Call me when you come! I will wait exactly for one hour and then I leave."

Well gal on the line appeared to have more sense than this complete nonsensical fellow. If I were to suggest, She should go to the library forever than be with this guy for a minute...

About 50 minute later, the auto stopped at the Pune Station.
"How much is it?", he asked the Auto rickshaw driver

"100 ruppees"

Damn this Auto driver has robbed me, he thought as he paid the guy but I had to hurry.

"Now how much am I left ?", he mumbled. "Damn, 110 this is bad... + 100 from my reserve that is 210 and there is 3 rupee change so 213."

"OK nearest ATM of HDFC at east street, so auto fare will not be more than .... *4 +2 that is 10 or at max 12 so I have 201 left. Now, where is the florist... shit man no florist at the station. Ok Chocolates... " he kept on mumbling as he walked without paying attention to the traffic and oblivious to the abuses hurled by the chaotic traffic.

He ran across the street narrowly missing a car, bumping into a bicycle front wheel, making his rider loose his balance and in the process getting the title of "Yede" (mad).

Now I must confess that this bicycle rider must have been a sheer genius to have analysed his character in a blink of an eye.

"OK. Ferrero Rocher ...160.."he continued his calculation..
"Ferrero Rocher??" he questioned the shopkeeper.
"No"
He jumped to the next shop..."Ferrero Rocher??" he questioned the shopkeeper.
"No"
And then he hopped to the third ..."Ferrero Rocher??" he questioned the shopkeeper.
"No"
"Kidhar milega?" ("Where will I find it?")
"Idhar nahin" ( Not in the neighbourhood)
"Cadbury's temptations?"
"Yes"
"Which Flavours?"
"Rum and raisin, almonds, all of them are here.."
" give me 5 ", he said while mentally calculating 40*5 is 200.

"He shoved the chocolates in his bag and ran towards the BJ Medical college"

"Two minutes are still there.."

"Hey, where are you I am at the gate...", He spoke on his cellphone.
"I am coming downstairs in two minutes.."

"Hiiii, since you were late I was in the library", she said with an extra stress on I when he saw her..

Damn, man MBBS is quite tough, he spoke in his mind or may be perfectionist study a lot!!

"I am sorry... Now where do you want to go?"

"So, finally you made it! I was waiting for you all the time...We can go wherever you want!"

In his mind he spoke to himself, " I made it? You have no idea how I made it! Boy do you have any ideas that the train services from North India has been interrupted due to floods... And you know I would have made even if I were Dead... Boy you waited for me all the time...You would come with me... anywhere.... Please say it to me once more... Please... "

Now this idiot, (and I hope "the idiots" don't take offense) had interpreted the meaning totally out of context! Get back to reality for heaven sake!

"Get back to reality" he did. "Before we leave I need to go to HDFC ATM, I have just 10 rupees in my pocket", he said as if he had a Ferrari in his pocket. Well, I did say "Get back to reality" but I did not expect it to be in such a loser style.

I was not there to advise him but rain gods were. This is a love story isn't it? So how could it be without rain? And It's my story so I can do whatever I want. Isn't it?

And as with every story that is even remotely connected to romance, it started to rain... Not heavily. It never rains heavily in Pune, just a drizzle.

"Hey it has started raining.", he said and we better get going before you catch a cold..

Great Man! You are not as stupid as you look! With a little bit of luck the guy can actually date. Man come on Dance on Chance
Come on ask her to walk... She's carrying an umbrella. One umbrella two people. What more could you want! This is the best way you can get close to her!!! Literally and figuratively. You are a broke! The ATM ain't that far. Ask her to walk with you. If you don't I'll curse you till my death bed...

"I could never understand the whole point of sharing an umbrella, in the end both the individuals get wet! It's better not to share, that ways, atleast one of them is gonna stay dry. Let's take a rick!!!"

Come on you lunatic how dumb can you get! Hell with your rationality!!! "Both the individuals get wet". Hell The whole point of sharing an umbrella is to get wet and in turn come closer!!! Damn you nub! People even get wet with umbrella and raincoat! Did you forget Mr. India, Chalbaaz, Spiderman! Don't you watch movies! "Pyaar hua ikraar hua ... Pyar se fir kyon darta hai dil.." The eternal Raj Kapoor's rain song! That's the beauty of rain. The umbrella is only there to cover your face when you start coochicooing. There is only one thing that annoys me more than seeing talent going wasted and that is opportunity going wasted.

Stupid, the love is not in the air but it is in the rain. Hell you'll die in hell. Damn' it you insulted the rain god! You mocked the Cupid! And lastly, let's leave that God Out, I have a feeling that you haven't been blessed by him!!! How can one, ever be so dumb!

She turned around,opened her umbrella and pretended to move towards the college gate. Look, that's the real use of an umbrella. If you would turned her and looked at her face. You could easily, see her disgust and dismay at being stuck with such a loser. And in all probability she would be dead than be seen with you idiot.

But, he was too busy in himself to notice that she had turned away and moved towards the gate. He adjusted his back-pack and rummaged through it to take out the chocolates.

"Hey Niharika, wait!" he called as he caught up to her at the gate.

"What?", she looked to him with questioning eyes.

"I am sorry", he said.

"It's Ok.", she said as her eyes were still fixed on him.

Slowly, her eyes moved down to his hand holding a chocolate and her eyes brightened with excitement and innocence of a child. She grabbed the chocolate and said "Thank You!" as she turned around unwrapping the packet.

He admired the skills with which she tore the wrapping, it seemed as if it was not a chocolate but a blooming flower.

I do agree that her unwrapping style was in contrast with his rustic savage method. He was the one who would open any parcel like a dog mad on a newspaper, however it was not the most important thing to be admired. What we males need to admire is the effortless way in which girls transfer their gaze from one part of body to the other, on the other hand males have almost always have their eyes fixed on six inches below the gals chin. Our so called hero, may be an an exception though.

She had barely taken two steps when he called her name again, "Niharika!"
She turned again.
"I am sorry!", he said as his hand held another chocolate to her.
She was surprised and delighted, "You know you have completely made up for the delay", she said as she accepted another one. She once again turned to proceed to the gate.

"Niharika, I am sorry!!!", he said again as he another chocolate in his hand.
She turned and said, "This is too good!" and took another bar from him. She looked at him, and he thought "damn she is pretty."

Seeing, a poker face she turned again to the the gate.

"I am sorry", he said again as soon as she turned her back.
She turned to find him holding another chocolate out of nowhere. "Alright, out with it. How many more do you have?"
"Just one more", he grinned. "I am sorry!" and he handed her the fifth bar and then called out to an Auto-rickshaw.

Man, I got to admit that he is not that stupid. I always knew "Chocolates" were an aphrodisiac but it being a mood changer, is something I haven't heard before. Besides, this guy played his cards right. He did two things that any gal loves besides chocolate.
1. Pampering.
2. Hearing "sorry" from guys, it doesn't matter for what!

In the rickshaw, he admired her lovely face. Fine, I know her name is Niharika, and I also know that "Niharika" means someone to be admired( Niharna = looking amiringly) but Damn you duffer you think of romance now! You blew away an excellent opportuninty. Why the hell did you take an auto-rickshaw? With only 13 Rs in your pocket. Hell you should be looking at the meter! Heck, are you gonna ask her to pay? If ever, they are going to distribute the Noble for the worst grasp of situation, this guy would win it hands down!!!

Why doesn't this guy write a book titled "1001 dumb things to do on a date"?

"Bas yahin rok dena Bhaiya", (Please stop the auto rickshaw) he said as the rickshaw reached the ATM.

"Wait", he mumbled to the gal whose face he had been admiring all the while. And without even waiting for her response. He jumped out and ran across the road. Jumped over the fence that served over the road divider and ran to the ATM without even looking for the traffic. Somewhere a car came to a screeching halt. He muttered "sorry" which was barely audible, and then joined the queue at the ATM.

A couple of minutes later, someone patted him at the back.

"You should have atleast waited for me!", she said.

" I told you to wait!", he said as a matter of fact.

Sorry, my dear you didn't say you just mumbled. An incomprehensible word, that no one in the world could possibly understand.

Across the road, the auto rickshaw that they had hired started its ignition and sped away.

Kudos, to you dude!!! First you tell her that you have no money and then you make her pay and on top of that you are the one who hired a rickshaw. Man, the golden rule of going dutch is to be able to pay for your part, you cheap!

"Why don't you get into the umbrella?", she asked.
With his face turned up towards the sky, he spread his arms, and felt the rain drops on his closed eyes, he just muttered through his grinding his teeth, "I am fine. I Like rain!"
" I don't like rain", she said.
" What you don't like rain?" He came out of his trance...

Boy, she means to say she doesn't like rain with you.

" I mean I like rain, but I don't like puddle of mud. You know you get dirty."

"So, you want slopes so that the water doesn't stay to form a puddle. You don't want your feet to get dirty."

"Yeah, exactly! I shouldn't get my feet dirty."

"Aapke paanv itne sunder, inhe zameen pe mat rakhiyega, maile ho jayenge" ,he laughed at his own joke.( One of the most famous dialogue of the Indian cinema of all times from the movie "Pakeezah" roughly translated in english as "Your feet are so beautiful, don't keep them on ground lest it should be dirty.)

"Not Panv, joote gande nahin hone chahiye", she said playing along and lifted her leg to indicate to show her dislike for muddy water. ("Not feet but even my shoes shouldn't get dirty." )

He laughed but in the process he caught the twinkle in her eyes. Mesmerized, his face grew serious. He spoke, "Now, I really can't change the terrain nor I could clean the puddle formed in Pune but I could do one thing..."

He went on his knees, and joined his hands to form a cup in front of her sandals, looked straight into her eyes and said,"Madam Please..."

She turned her head and looked away. And then she smiled...

I believe chivalry is not something that can be taught, it has to come from heart... and true chivalry would always bring smiles on faces of maidens...

PS: If you are a female reader, the story ends here for you. DO NOT HIGHLIGHT THE REST OF THE BLANK AREA IN AN ATTEMPT TO READ FURTHER. FEMALES SHOULD NOT READ ANY FURTHER.
Males please highlight the area below and to read further


Now, guys we all know that it was dumb thing to do. To be honest, I couldn't think of a way to end this post. Anyways, you think she smiled because he was chivalrous? Or she smiled because she was dead embarrassed? Or she smiled because he was dead dumb? What do you think? Pleas do let me know. Really it isn't that simple to figure out what a female mind thinks. Is it? Even God have failed to understand it?
But in general, they don't listen and always do the opposite of what has been told to them. They are never satisfied and always snooping. They act to prove themselves smart and fails miserably. Then they are fuming in anger and label us chauvinist.

The females would say, "How dare you say that?" I am sorry mam but I also told you not to read any further. Didn't I? You did not listen. Just did opposite of what I told you. You were not satisfied with the story and snooped. You acted to prove yourself smart and failed. Now you are angry and thinking that I am an MCP. Am I wrong?

17 comments:

Puneet said...

witty man! shitty witty. eating maggi, and other things. You defined the story really well. The dumb guy was really sweet to do that chocolate thing to her. Man he must really love her to do so much thinking for her. haha. really great. Of the answer of the girl, I think this girl would smile and put his hand on his face. "Boy, my shoes deserve much more than your hands!!!"
"So, c'mon, let's enjoy the rain dirtying our shoe!!!"
I was busy with my studies buddy, but then I did complete another poem, do read it on my blog.
A happy New Year to you too!!!

falcon said...

@Puneet
Happy new year to you once again!
Thx for the comment.. You know this blog needs more comment to the be alive...

I could not grab the essence of the girl reply.. please elaborate..

Lastly, I never proof read my posts so kindly let me know of any grammatical/spelling mistakes that you find in my post... when you notice one. Though it is not a compulsion and more over I don't like being pointed out my mistakes :D

Puneet said...

Firstly I think the girl smiled because she thought that how hard he is trying to make up for his mistake.
As of the reply of the girl(by me). the way you showed the girl, she has got the regular traits of a typical girl, but one thing is there - rationality. she is very rational and cracks a joke
"Boy, my shoes deserve much more than your hands!!!"
and then she realises that how much hard he is trying to make her happy and this is sufficient for her. So she gives a treat to the guy by saying
"So, c'mon, let's enjoy the rain dirtying our shoe!!!"
juzz that.
And of my poem, please do tell me where you disagreed. Start the debate buddy!!!
I will tell you the mistakes if I find any(I am good at it) and mail it to you(you sound dangerous so i won't post it here!!!)

faizee said...

still reading...long tale...wait some more time for my comment :P

Nanhe said...

Well... after reading the long tale....it felt really good to read something different...moreover this is post by falcon after quite some time.....
I loved the supidity of guy more that the beauty of gal...and mind u i m not a gay... [:P]

Vijay said...

well it was great....i believe gal smiled due to confusion in her mind..."not for whether to say yes or no"....but is guy so stupid that he want to be on knee for being late..[:)]....u can never understand gal!!!!

Raghav Goyal said...

its a good post... thats for sure... we can always relate our lives in a way or another when we read a story... so i have this friend who i can safely say is a replica of your dumb guy and he loves this girl(though she is not that good looking)... in the end, though she knew he loved her a lot she dumbed him... coz she was like "O.k. you love me,but you gotta change coz you embarass me"
the guy was like "I wont change for anybody"... so this could be the end of your story too... the guy loves her and she knows that but with that kind of stupidity its gonna be difficult to live with him...
by the way probablly you have heard it dozern other times but you have a good style of writting...

falcon said...

@Vijay
Thx for visitin my blog.. And Welcome to it.. By the way u never told me that u blog...

@Raghav

Welcome to Falcon Eyes...

Thx for the appreciation...And As for ur example... Break up and falling in and out of love is a part of life

Nothing to do with smartness...And u can't really love anybody provided he changes....
It doesn't make any sense " I love you only if u do this and u do that " It's all meaningless.
I feel IT WAS GOOD THAT THE GAL dumped ur friend. He deserves someone better.

As for my writing, reading ur comments and of the others I Believe that I failed in the character sketch of the Hero...I thought I was able to bring out the character as I intended it to be.... A very complex nature...

For Eg:

>>he had this devil may care attitude.

"I am what I am" attitude

>>Drink the water of a finger bowl only to get the pleasure of embarrassing his friends.

Able to laugh at oneself..And aware of action..

Raghav Goyal said...

@falcon
yes, i do agree with you you shouldnot change yourslef to be get apretiation from others... but sometimes changing is for good... a person is never perfect he has few flaws.... some are minor and defines the person but there are some which could coz hinderess in a person's prgress... these have to be removed and your loved ones are the only one who could help you in doing that....
example... i smoke... its a sadest thing a teenager could do to riun his life..(yes i know that yet, i do it)...now if my friend try to stop me from doing it adoipting any method they think would work...i should be glad....rather than being critical about "you want to change me"...

falcon said...

@raghav

you said it urself...

>>. i smoke... its a sadest thing a teenager could do to riun his life..(yes i know that yet, i do it)...now if my friend try to stop me from doing it adoipting any method they think would work...i should be glad....

U should be glad...
And U should change...
And ur friends must try to make u a better person...

But As u said it .. They are ur friends first and then they try to improve u...
They accepted u as it is and want to change u for ur betterment...

It's not that they say, " U quit smokin and then think of being friends"..

It's always acceptance then change .. not change and then there may be a possibility of any relationship..

As for ur posts.. I liked the one i read ...

falcon said...

@raghav

you said it urself...

>>. i smoke... its a sadest thing a teenager could do to riun his life..(yes i know that yet, i do it)...now if my friend try to stop me from doing it adoipting any method they think would work...i should be glad....

U should be glad...
And U should change...
And ur friends must try to make u a better person...

But As u said it .. They are ur friends first and then they try to improve u...
They accepted u as it is and want to change u for ur betterment...

It's not that they say, " U quit smokin and then think of being friends"..

It's always acceptance then change .. not change and then there may be a possibility of any relationship..

As for ur posts.. I liked the one i read ...

Raghav Goyal said...

@falcon
yes, there is always that thing and i expect the girl of your story and my friend's real life to be that... they had both accepted the guys in there life knowing how their patner exacly were... they patiently waited for them... looked for the spark... but thee still didn change dispite thier try and lived thier life in "devil-may-care" attitude... thinking they couldnt possibly do anything wrong...this my dear friend is not accepted.... even my friends would drop asking me to quit, if i didnt and they dont talk to me if i do it infront of them and that does stop me from doing it...

and i am glad to liked reading my post... by the way which one did you read?

ranjini said...

ha ha :-) really good one... we always appreciate chivalry... but its not the only thing we fall for...

falcon said...

@ranjini

first of all welcome to falcon eyes!!!

secondly. THx for the appreciation!!!

and thirdly, >>we always appreciate chivalry... but its not the only thing we fall for...

I know it as a matter of fact!!! what I don't know ...is the other things that girls fall for...

Could you list them!!! .... It would be a gr8 help. Seriously, Shayad is bande ka kuch bhla ho jaye ...lol

ranjini said...

too many to be listed here... but u have already mentioned the thing that tops the list in ur blog... :-)

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Richa said...

Well, since ur asking opinion about wat she mite hv smiled for…I being a girl cn explain bttr…she smiled coz she realized tht the guys really cared for her and meant the sorry…tht sorry ws not merely a tongue exercise and she liked the way the guy cared fr her…she mite have also liked his effort to make her smile….

Also, I agree tht we do exactly opposite of what u say…coz if we start doin wat u say thn our world wil be at loss fr sure…it wil be like runnin at the whims of sm confused bum…who dus nth v the slightest of idea to do or say a certain thing…

And now I have a question to ask…tht I will ask u personally, so wait for it…