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Saturday, June 30, 2007

The longest nine hours

" His father told him that story: his father looked at him through a glass: he had a hairy face.

He was baby Tuckoo.The Moocow came down the road where Betty Bayne lived: She sold lemon platt.
O' the wild blossoms
On the little green place

He sang that song. That was his song.
O, the green wothe botheth...

Tralala lala,
Tralala Tralaladdy,
Tralala lala,
Tralala lala.

- James Joyace
( Potrait of an artist as a young man)

But, all was not well in his life. And his life was certainly not a song . This was 21st century- where the world had become closer but people who lived here had become alien. He had made a mistake. He was in love . It was his fault. He was oblivious to his mistake. He had maintained his fault. This was his double fault.

He was honest, at least to her. He boarded the bus.He wanted to return her photographs...

Her voice kept ringing in his head. "I don't think I want to see you at all.... I can't see you.. I have lectures... I can't come.."

He made a promise,"I'll wait for you !!! 10:00 am at the station." And he would have to wait. It was his promise. He intended to keep it!

Three and a half hour long journey was longer than expected. He was 30 minutes late. He was there at 10:32. "She must have gone! "No she would wait am reply came from his heart."

This was 21st century but who would have explained to this fellow. He looked around, the station was bustling with activities. People, rickshaws, chaos.... all was there - omnipresent. All but her.

"People and people everywhere,
but not a soul in sight"

He waited and waited... The weather was sunny, his bag was heavy... he looked at his watch .... only three minutes had passed. He looked at the sun , it was unforgiving... He smiled and beared the scorching sun.

He waited... the sun waited with him.... but "time" didn't wait.... 12:00... 1:00.... 2:00.... 3:00 pm. he shifted restlessly.

Only an hour or two to go before her college was over... She would then come surely...

5:00pm. The sun had shown mercy, even it was tired but the "Hope Fairy" said she would come soon....And he waited... "hoping against hope"

Another hour passed the sun was going to set..... it mocked and said "Good Bye dear, you wait... she will come... "

Out came the stars slowly, It was over seven.... The moon said in its mournful light. You ought to go now....

He boarded the bus. His three and a half hour return journey began.... As his bus passed her college. A faint smile spread at the corner of his lips..."This is indeed 21st century."

Hey, what are you thinking? This is 21stcentury. "Love" and "Dinosaur" are extinct now. It's all a figment of imagination!!!

Friday, June 29, 2007

Sleepless Nights: My worst nightmare

I am completely sloshed as I write this post ( i.e when I chose to write it on a piece of paper)but don't you worry I am not as thunk as drunk I am. I thought a hundred times before I chose to write this post (well actually It will be a series of three posts) but may be due to influence of alcohol I decided to go ahead. May be Nadira* won't like it but at least, I will have a reason, as what made her upset.( If at all she bothers to read the series...)

Anyways, let me tell you a fact, I am kind of freak, insane, mentally unstable psycho guy.(If you don't believe me ask Nadira, she may add some more distinctions to my character!!!) And believe me when I say, you cannot scare me, especially with pain or threat to life etc. I have done things that you would recommend me a solitary confinement but let's save that for the later.

Now, Where was I? Yes, I remember but It doesn't mean I am never scared. There is one thing that still sends a cold shiver down my spine. A kind of chill that you could only experience when you have a nightmare like mine or somebody points a loaded revolver on your temple for the "first" time.( Afterwards you kind of get used to it.)

When I was doing my +2, I had to stay all alone for a period of about a month. No friends, for they had all gone home for holidays, no contacts.... And I had a dream, my nightmare... my worst...

I saw... I went to see a network of tunnels and caves 8in a mountain. Fortunately, for me I was not the lone visitor .there were also28 little kids accompanied by their teachers. It was a bright sunny day.. a perfect day for a picnic but as soon as we all entered the cave it collapsed and entrance was blocked.

Now, the only option left for me was to move downward and look for another exit. I took the lead and asked the kids to follow me . So, i descended downwards, the earth was shaking, and all the dust and pebbles below my feet were moving downwards. It was difficult to keep my balance..... I lied in a natural rock cut shelter, and observed the rate at which the earth moved downwards.

After a while, I continued my descent, aware of the speed of relative objects moving, beneath my feet.. with the kids following me at some distant. Suddenly a rock and some rubble fell from nowhere.The rock grazed past my hands, the torch fell from my hand and swung around looking was a reflex action. the rubble had closed the passage. I looked downward, and it was closed.

I was trapped, in a 18 * 5 feet cell. All I could see was some green bushes at some distance through a hole of 6 inch in diameter, which had been formed due to caving in of the earth.

I said "oh God" and my eyes opened. I was sweating profusely, so much that my whole T shirt was wet.. I was shivering, I had goose bumps...and worst of all I remembered the face of every child and amazingly not of any teachers. what was worse was that I believed that all kids were real. I was never for the entire episode afraid for my life... but I had this guilt of not being able to do anything for the kids.

It was around 3:00 am, I went downstairs and did 171 sit-ups on the double bar
(270 degree of movement) all non-stop. My stomach ached, it was difficult to breathe, my head was reeling but I had managed to tire myself out. Completely exhausted, i slept.

I woke the next day, did my regular job, the day was fine but night came... and I was perspiring...again. At about 11:00 I called up home, mom consoled me, but peace was still evading...

I tried to read a book, but those faces came back... it was haunting, I needed a shoulder, a shoulder to cry... there was none.

The only person that was still available in Pune, I knew was "Miss Nadira" and we were not on talking terms. I was all alone. .. Alone and horrified. Horrified and petrified.. Petrified and alone. Alone and shaken..... Shaken and broken... Broken and haunted. Haunted by those faces....Haunted by failure. Failure to protect them... Failure to save the kids... Failure of not being able to stand. Failed and ashamed. Ashamed of being small. Small and insignificant. Insignificant and alone. Alone and the sole survivor. Survivor but a loser. A loser and alone. Alone and uncared... Uncared and alone. Alone... Alone and alone. Alone and lonely. Lonely and alone.

I cried and sobbed. Sobbed and wailed.Wailed and cried. Cried and cried...but my cries were muffled between the four walls of my flat. I thought why wasn't I dead and kids alive. Each face came to my memory... all so innocent, so pure and I could do nothing to save them . Why was this happening? It was a dream but who was there to reason me out?

Out came the newspapers, "Times of India", "The Indian Express", "The Hindu", "The Herald" ..... no such news, no such incident..... I was perspiring.....( Being alone made me read a lot of newspapers.)

I searched Google, no results yet. AOL, yahoo, Bigfoot, Metacrawler... No such happenings.

Why did I see only kids? Why only 28 kids? Why only such school uniforms? I have no answers... Why not a bus accident? Why only a landslide? I don't know. What I saw was real . It is real . It is more than a dream..... It is something beyond my comprehension....

About 5 years have passed since then but still I have hairs standing on end as I recall my nightmare...Can somebody explain me my dream.. I just want those kids to survive. And if this is a premonition then I won't let it happen. Come what may!

Thursday, June 28, 2007

Between Friends

There are few statements that leave you completely stumped, at other times you want to shoot eith3er yourself or the sayer. Here are some of those:

1. I: "yaar, mere ko 3 assignment, 2 files, 4 test paper aur 9 experiment likhne hai"
Sam: "ghabra mat yaar, mer pass (CD)writer hai na!!!"

2. VP(Copying Hulk):"Now you are making me angry. You won't like me when I am angry."
Sandy:"I don't like you anyways!!!"

3. Him: "yaar, abhi rainbow nikla hoga! Jab mein Gujrat mein tha to maine kai bar rainbow dekha tha.Mumbai mein ek bar bhi nahin dekha!"
Sidbha: "haan , woh (rainbow) shift ho gaya na!"

4. BSL: "yaar apna pehle weight bhadha, jab mein Pulsar seekh raha tha to mujhse bhi bike control nahin hoti thi. Main do baar gira, fir aadat ho gayi"
Him: " Sahi hai, ab girne ki aadat ho gayi hai!!!"

5. At 3:00 am, Somebody said: "Look at DD, he does everything according to his routine."
Just then his alarm started ringing .
I: "ya, it's his time to wake up and pee!!!"

6. Somebody asked, "what are you going to do with your first salary?"
Him: "will buy a new mobile"
I: "Will buy a washing machine!"
BSL: "So, what Sidbha does with his salary?"
Aj: "Aishwarya(bar) .... daru...IB...quarter"
I: "Nahin, iske salary se iske dost girlfriend patate hai woh bhi iski!!!"

7. My biology teacher: "The heart makes a "Lupp" and "Dupp" sound due to closing and opening of its valves at every Systole and Distole. It's not "Dhak Dhak" as popularly believed."
I: Mam, then the song should be " Main jo sochoon teri baat jiyera lupp-dup lupp-dup bole"
Mam:"yes you make such songs! Get out of the class!"

8. After being completely sloshed Sidbha, Aj, and Iwere sitting on a pavement near our flat arround 2:00-3:30 am.The watchman of the underconstruction tower building Starts hooting whistle from the other side of the road.
On every 1st whistle- Sidbha : Bhen****!
On every 2nd whistle- Aj : Madar*&@*!
On every 3rd whistle- I : Sala, Bhen*@$# ! Gay kahin ka! line mar raha hai sala!
citi marta hai! ghar mein bhai baap nahin hai kya?!!!

9. I: "Monu what happened? so many scratches on your face? and your eye looks a
little swollen?
Monu: "nothing!"
I: " Ok, I'll ask M*!" ( his gf)
Monu: "I'll tell you"
Here is what he told me!!
In the local zoo four filthy guyswere looking at M*
M* : "look at the way those guys are staring at me!"
Monu: "what can I do?" ( not that he can't do)
M* ( angrily): "yes what can you do? Even if they rape me, you won't do anything!
you'll sit and watch!!!"
Monu ( all charged up): "Tum kya mujhe Namard samajhti ho?"
M*( thinkin that she has overeacted sweetly says : " what can you do? They are four. ( Monu at that time was perhaps good enough for eight.)
Monu : Main boloonga, " Bhai sahab mere ko bhi ek chance plz!!!"
The rest is all understood!!!

Monday, June 25, 2007

This is APJ

A lot has already been sad about the president and the presidential election. A.P.J Abdul Kalam has been severely criticized both for his work during his tenure and over his desire to continue for the second term, but is this all fair???

Well, it is democracy and everybody is entitled to have their own opinion, but burning effigies of the president and that two by two chief ministers is a bit going overboard. Isn't it?. He seems to have fallen out with both the UPA and the NDA, the only people supporting him is the Left front, which opposes anything for the sake of opposing!!! Ironically it was the same Left that had opposed his candidature the last time.

That's Indian politics and it is for the same reason APJ withdrew from contest. Still, the Media, the politicians even the blogger are not sparing him. So, here am I, yours truly, to his defence!!! Alright I heard that, "The last person that APJ needs for his defence is you". Fine by me, but remember I said its "Democracy"!!!

That's Indian politics and it is for the same reason APJ withdrew from contest. Still, the Media, the politicians even the bloggers are not sparing him. So, here am I, yours truly, to his defence!!! Alright I heard that, "The last person that APJ needs for his defence is you". Fine by me, but remember I said its "Democracy"!!!

Yesterday, I read an article by Vir Sangvi in HT, and true to his style he made Kalam a puppet president from People's president and the transition was so slow and subtle that u don't realise it and you start believing him.That's why he is among India's best.

Anyway, people say he had been a puppet prez and his performance is below par.. So if that's true can anyone just tell me, if he is really a puppet prez than why is congress not seeking its second term, After all a puppet person will bow to every whims and fantasy of 10 Janpath just' like Mr. Prime minister. And let me remind you the office of Profit Bill which everyone is talkin' about, is the FIRST BILL EVER TO HAVE BEEN RETURNED BY ANY PREZ.( gyan: courtsey HT )It was passed again with no changes and the maximum a prez could do was delay it. Why delay the inevitable?

I think he fell out of favour because having APJ as prez no longer fit into the UPA as well as NDA scheme. NDA had no Gujarat to cover up and UPA is no longer in opposition, so...So. So. So.....

The next thing I want to tell you, that he is that he is very much the people's prez.. and an ace manager with great administrating skills. Remember he was the chief scientific advisor and the way he kept Pokhran II a secret.

Now, I'll tell you a true incident, the first time Prez decided to visit Patna, Rabri government was in power. And true to their style they made roads as smooth as cheeks of "Hema Malini" and that to in jiffy, but there was one little problem the stretch was only from Airport to the Governor House, but served the purpose for it was all that was there in prez visit plan.

However our prez didn't bite the bait, he was too smart for them. At the last minute he would desire to see a place and you can't refuse a prez. can you? And Rabri government had no explanation for the anarchy as well as sharp contrast in the infrastructure. Unfortunately their ordeal was not going to be over yet. Our missile and few missiles left in his attack...

He happened to carry a list of complaints received from administrative sections and not to mention the failed and plagued government machinery. He personally visited them, listened to the problems, asked for explanations and gave them solutions.

This is APJ Abdul Kalam the people's president and I salute him. Got any problems?

Friday, June 22, 2007

What's going on?

This post is not a rip off from the track of "Salam Namaste". It is actually a comment on the Idiosyncrasies of Indians.

Yesterday, I was watching TV thanks to the TV tuner card borrowed from Varun, and everywhere on the news channel flashed only one name actually two but I will come to that later. "Sunita"! "Sunita"!! "Sunita"!!!

" Who the hell is this Sunita ?", I thought. "Must be some new actress in some Ekta Kapoor Serials"! After watching the whole news I realized it isn't the "Sunita" of Ekta Kapoor, it's even worse, it being, She is "Sunita Williams"!!! Never for a moment I realized that they were talking about the "Sunita Williams"!!!

Now, let me be very clear, I have nothing against her and why should I? She has done a commendable job, I wish her a safe entry and many more success to come. She is the type of daughter that every mother would have! but that's it!!! Let it be the end, Why make her a demigod ? Why? She is given a treatment that even Neil Armstrong would crave for?
And that exactly is my problem, we are obsessed with people of Indian Origin? We go Ga-Ga over their success and make them demigod and what do they do in return? They spit on our face?

"V.S Naipaul" oh he is such a great writer! he is fabulous! bull- shit at my prime I could write better than him! and that's not bragging it's just being modest. Anyway how does he react to our appreciation. To quote him, " 30 years ago Indians were just not literate enough to appreciate my writing". Fucker what's there to appreciate in your books!!! And 30 years ago, was the time of our father and mother and believe me when I say, our parents have a better grip over literature than you and I will ever have. For the simple reason that society then was more Arts dominated they had the time to study, cherish and relish literature while we don't !!! Our knowledge of English literature begins with Shakespeare and ends with Dan brown. Hindi does anybody know beyond "Premchand"???

Yes, you say you know but how much, so much that Oscar Wilde becomes "wildee", "Guy DE Maupassant" is "Maupassant" (and not "Maupassa" ! ( Sarcasm here! It is called "maupassa" Wish I could use phonetic symbols here )Anyway for those who think I am still overestimating my writing skills then tell you a fact if Naipaul can think Twain, Joyce ( James), Wilde and Dickens were a piece of trash then even I can think he is not even worth a "fucking horse shit" ( freedom of speech and expression!!!)
And, that is just one example, I can go on citing many; but the post will become too long (as if it weren't!). The point is that we have enough talent in our country and instead of wasting your money in wishing Sunita who in all probability won't even read your sms you could help a child to nurture his talent.

Look, what Kalpana Chawala did! At first I thought she was brought up here, studied here, but when it came to serve she went to USA. And I was wrong, she went because she wouldn't have got the opportunities here and every year she took full responsibility of a Girl Child's education.May be a meagre amount of her earnings but nevertheless she did that.

I respect Sunita and Chawala for their accomplishments, but I am not overawed by them. I pray for Sunita safe return, but I also pray for the safety of her team members. And Never ever am I going to do a "Yagya" for her. She is not the only member of the team nor she is the most important. She being of the Indian origin does not change her position in the space nor does it reduce her risk. The space doesn't even care about her origin better we start doing the same.

Respect her for her individuality, appreciate her for her work not for her origin.