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Friday, March 27, 2009

A Passing thought...

I admit I am unable to understand finance... And I know I can never understand finance. How can I? I am not able manage my own finances, how can I even think of knowing about the finances of companies.

And regarding investment ... the less said the better. I have almost invested 33% of my current life hoping that I would get return... [Read: the girl would return my love... :'( ] But till now the company seems to be in perpetual losses. Oh' Sushmita Sen where art thou? So, imagine what a poor investor I would be.

They say, your portfolio must be a blend of both risk free and low interest investment & high risk and high gain investments....
But my story is like Lehman Bros. You know it's looks big and future is so bright but only the insiders know it's crumbling!!!

Man, I am like a pauper at the Wall Street... Ok Let's make that BSE. Man the market-price of even simple average low yielding government PSU Allahabad bank is beyond my reach. Just like my love life ... Even simple stupid, smart, cute sexy hot gals are like Rashmi, Rita, Sita,Shivangi, Sheetal etc are asking a lot. And Don't you go by the good terms mentioned above. You know they just might read this post and moreover, How can a girl be called UGLY?

So, the point is my pocket as well as my love life are into perpetual recession. And which one is more severe I dread to answer the question...

One thing is clear, that like finance theories, which tell you a lot, but give you contradicting views, so that you are ultimately more confused than earlier, theories of getting a gal is equally perplexing. Consider this, while one of the Gays ( gay means happy in old English and they are gay because they have a gal) propose that once you get a gal all your financial troubles are gone. The other proponents argue that the expenditure of a guy rises exponentially with the increase in number of girlfriends.

So being with such gays doesn't help a fool like me! I mean whatever may be the market condition the small investor always loses money and so is the case with me!!!

Now the whole world is busy licking their wounds from the stock market and so are the cool girls who were dumped by their boyfriends. [yeah I hate admit it but they found me too dumb :( ] I want to say the very same words that my friend wanted to say to the Senior Lehman Brother executive when he was rejected by him in an interview. [ He too was found too dumb by the Lehman Bros. Actually, these golden words came when he was on a high after he heard that the Lehman had gone bankrupt.]

"I may be too dumb. I may know nothing but I can surely bet had you chosen me as your CEO,[Boy, he a CEO!!!] I certainly wouldn't have left you half as bad! MotherF@#%er, you think you can hire me? Do you have enough money to pay the electricity bill of your AC!!!"

Did you hear that gals? You think you are so much in demand, don't you? So did the financial analysts. Heard about the Sub-prime crisis? The demand they created was an artificial one, just like yours. You know they thought the prospects are good, and gave credit to ones who didn't deserve. Just like you!!! And, now when they are crying ... I thought it was my duty to warn you.

The investors say the market was full of funny money. "Funny Money!!!" it's neither funny nor is there any "money". The investors got a return of more than 100% from the market when it was on upswing. They were on cloud nine. What they forgot was the law of gravitation!!! Just think over it gals, how long would a market sustain itself to give a return of more than 100% when the industry on which it is based on, is growing on a rate of 10 to 15%. How long can a guy give you a commitment of 100% when the relationship on which it is based on, is growing at a rate of 10 to 15%?

I know I have talked about it in my very first post about two and half years ago ... yet I find it truly amazing even now...

It's quite amazing that Finance guys always talk about market efficiency, where there is free flow of information, and prices reflect all information and stuff, and then lament it is never the case. Isn't it surprising that it is the Finance guys and us who made this market so complex and entangled. And then it is again the Finance guys, who are working overtime and spending nights to get simple information out of it! And the rest of us. are still trying to figure out what went wrong!!!
Just like our relationships! First we all made a mess of our life. And then we are working overtime and spending nights to get simple joys out of it! And the rest of us are still trying to figure out what went wrong!!!

I said it all in a jest, but in fact one of the biggest failure in my life has been my inability to explain the ones whom I care for, that Even I can do something without any self-interest!!!

PS: 1)With due credit to my new roomies and their never ending blabbering about finance that has given me a constant headache.
2) If I am murdered after this post. You know whom to look for- A Female Financial Analyst, age 18-23, a recovering militant feminist, possibly with specks and extremely yummy!!!
3) If I am dead please send my regards and undying love to S.S.!!! :D

5 comments:

Raghav Goyal said...

seems like somebody is pissed...

falcon said...

@ Raghav

Really? And, may I know who is it?

Just a gentle reminder

>> I said it all in a jest

naveen said...

even after 23-24 years u dont have a gf then its definitely more severe recession than finacial crises.....and justb careful of lunkad and rathi....they r d other type i hope u understood......

Nanhe said...

Kuch bhi ho dost.....
Ladki se agar return lena hai to investment to karna hi padega....
There are no returns without investment.... I know financial crisis but that is th eonly way out....
But falcon my dear bro... why r u so pissed....i have always respected and admired u of having so many around u... i was just thinking of calling and asking arrange some one for me... but u r gone too..... ha ha....
Meri Zindagi mein gham hi gham hai
Khushiyan mujhe raas nahi
Main Dil bhi uss Ladki se laga baitha jiske milne ki mujhe aas nahi......

Puneet said...

It has been a long time i read your posts falcon. was busy with some things, so now i am back.. So you are still up and writing..
On the post, I guess I have been pretty lucky because I always go to seriously good companies in which I don't really have to invest, they just find me really good as a collateral, and also share the profits(I once got a 1000 bucks recharge for my cell from a girlfriend 900 kilometres away from my place). And I don't really remember the day I paid for my date. It is just how you negotiate with the other party. I always get them paying for me. ;) .
Anyways a great post and a great comparison!